Headlines, things the sea spewed up

We had just arrived on the Adriatic there were grey skies and rough seas. A filthy sea had been pounding the beach for days and it felt like the bastard would never sleep. Frothing at the mouth and spewing anything it couldn't immediately digest. Finally, when the beast had exhausted itself, the Daughter and I ventured out to sift through the objects it had heaved onto the shore. Here are the headlines:

Venetian Canal Cleaner Sucked into Adriatic, Flipper Found


Robber Races off Rimini Pier, Red Mask Recovered


Boating Incident Brushed Off


Leg of Chucky, Curse of the Great White


Dove In Croatia, Goggles Washed Up in Rimini